I am just laying here snuggling with you and would love to talk to you even though you don’t know what I am saying… Tonight, you puckered up and made a kiss sound when I said, “KISS!” and it was a glorious thing to behold. I think you finally get the idea of kisses! This makes me very happy.
Last week, we took you in your first tent camping for one night. You relished every moment of it. Me and dad laid there while you ran around in circles, exploring this interesting fort and leaning and sliding down the sides. We lost our energy long before you did, but there was nothing dangerous for you to get into, so I let you play as I drifted off to sleep to the sound of the waves. When I woke up in the middle of the night, there you were snuggled up in my arms. The tent had plenty of rolling room, not like at home, so by morning you had rolled all the way across the tent. Very impressive! When we woke up, the sun hadn’t risen yet, so we all crawled out of the tent and went for a swim in the warm water. The early sunlight was so beautiful and the wind blew through your fuzzy hair. We took your diaper off and let you run wild. All you want to do is swim! I think if you were making memories this young, you would never forget that morning. I know I won’t. It was the most beautiful morning of my life. You are my littlest free spirit. I hope you will always feel this free.
Let’s make a pact to always be free together. Always free together even when we are apart.
I love you so much,
11 months old… I am so unbelievably proud to be your mom. On Mother’s Day a few days ago, I went out with you just so I could parade you around & show off that I am your mother. I felt less like Mother’s Day was to honor the fact that I am a mom, and more like it was my day to reflect on how much motherhood and you particularly have saved my life. With you, I wake up every day feeling like it is the best day of my life. I have purpose, I have a full life, I have you. You saved me, Liam. I love you so so dearly, son. And I will always love you.
Dear Liam, Today’s drive to the North Shore alone made this move worth it. I don’t know if we knew exactly how beautiful our new home was going to be. I couldn’t even dream this place up… Neither could dad. I think the Aloha spirit is creeping into our bones one adventure at a time.
If I were to have a flashback of 2013, these would be some of my favorite flashes.
You are just shy of six months old now. I decided I wanted your great grandparents to meet you before we head off to Hawaii, so I booked us some standby tickets out to Texas. Mom was up all night with nerves. We got to the airport three hours early. I don’t know why I was so worried about getting you through security. Everyone was really helpful. They actually closed down our line to help us get through. I wasn’t expecting that… but we made it through no problem! We got to our gate super early, so I practiced sitting up with you. You did it! I was taking photos of how strong you were when you rolled onto your side. It scared you a little, but you weren’t hurt. Now I think you sit up even better because you know what will happen if you roll over.
On the airplane, you pretty much just made friends with everyone around us and wanted to play and bounce the whole time. You’re going to give me amazing arm muscles! You were awesome blossom the whole time. No earaches or fussiness at all. I’m a lucky mom, that’s for sure.
Anyway, we had an amazing trip. You saw your granddad and your great grandparents and your great Aunt Lynn and your second cousins. You saw your great aunt in a play! You bounced to the music, which makes me feel like you’re getting the concept of dancing, and grinned up at all the actors and actresses! One actress came down and held your hands and sang and danced with you. You totally loved it.
We had one night where we accidentally ate two dinners because we overbooked on dinner plans. For the second dinner, we had to pretend like we were starving. The woman who cooked for us exclaimed she gets hurt feelings if people don’t go for seconds, so we basically ate three heaping dinners. I was thankful you weren’t old enough to blow our cover by announcing it was our second time in the past hour we sat around the dinner table together. Whew! That was funny! At least the food was delicious.
There was no better way to spend a trip with you. We explored and relaxed and stared at each other and sang and made each other laugh. It was beautiful. You got to listen to your great grandfather play and sing on the ukelele. I’ll post a video if I can. They loved holding you and talking to you and seeing your amazing smile.
When we got the airport on the way home, we accidentally left your stroller at your great grandparents. Never do I wish anyone the hell that is traveling through an airport with an infant without a stroller. That was pretty rough. We survived… but barely. There were at least 3 airport cry sessions as a result. We won’t go into detail. But let’s just say Mommy was the one crying.
When we returned home, you had more family on the Poucel side who were happy to meet you. Your great Aunt Linda and Uncle Bob and second cousin Faith. We explored Pacific Beach, Coronado Island and La Jolla cove with them. The most memorable thing on that adventure was definitely the homeless old skateboarder pacing back and forth while yelling at us to stop crowding the sidewalk. He “didn’t care if we had money,” he just wanted us to stop thinking we could take up the whole sidewalk. He obviously wasn’t aware that sidewalks are for walking, not for skateboarding. He was kind of like the human version of a very scary, unpredictable shark. Daddy was not there to protect us but Grandma Poucel wasn’t afraid. Mommy was trying to hold her tongue so she didn’t make him even more mad, but I desperately wanted to scream at him for acting so threatening towards us while I was holding a baby. Glad we made it out of PB to tell the tale.
So next is Hawaii! We’re just about all packed. We leave the day after tomorrow. I’ll be sure to write again to keep you posted about how that adventure went.
Alright Liambear! Your longest nap has allowed a very long letter to you. Pretty excited about it.
Love you so much.